In my Retrospective 2009 post I mentioned that I was let go from Network Solutions but I went on to say that in the long run this may end up being a very good thing for me personally, professionally and financially. This seems a bit backwards, but so far it has been true. First off, we got reconsidered for the "Obama" mortgage modification plan and this knocked about $400 a month off our bill. Then I applied for temporary unemployment from Illinois and this has filled the gaps a bit.
However, when this happened it was pretty rough. Besides the obvious worries about money, there was a really strong sense of déjà vu regarding the situation. In fall of 2006, I was working for the Ferguson-Florissant School District but unfortunately was let go from that job.
This happened while Lisa was pregnant and due in early May of the next year. Additionally, I had Bronchitis (correction: Sinusitis) pretty bad and then later I got Cellulitis in my ankles. I vowed to get a new position very quickly come hell or high water, but these infections pretty much knocked me on my butt for weeks. The job market in fall of 2006 and into 2007 was not great anyway, but this just made it worse.
Of course I did get better. Before the baby was born, I gladly went back to work for my old friends at NetSol at my old position. I started catching up on those bills that had piled up. My son Lucas was born in late April instead of early May, but otherwise everything was great. It was arguably the best Summer of my life so far. Then Lucas died at the age of four months and seven days. That was 2007.
Fast forward to this last September when I was let go from Network Solutions. And again, I'd been nursing a pretty bad sinus infection. And again, an infection manifested in my ankles, this time diagnosed as Erythema nodosum. Lisa was also pregnant, but this time the baby would be born in December and not the following Spring!
That certainly felt like too much of a coincidence. You can spout off about the difference between causation and correlation if you'd like, but you are wasting your breath. My brain says that just because the pattern seemed to be repeating itself doesn't mean that it would continue. I get it logically, and so does Lisa. But the alarm bells in our hearts went off anyhow. Logic does not cure panic. Lisa was pregnant, I was pretty sick but got better, I lost my job and found a new one and then we lost our son. It happened before, it can happen again. Clouds of impending doom seemed to be gathering around us without much we could do about it.
At least, that's the way we felt initially. Further discussion with my current doctor revealed something my other doctor from 2006 didn't mention. It turns out that a severe infection in your sinuses and/or bronchii can enter the bloodstream and land somewhere else like your ankles as Cellulitis or Erythema nodosum. So what seemed like a weird cosmic coincidence was actually a likely cause and effect. I had a respiratory infection and as it wained, it found a new home in my ankles. I should have thought of it before.
More importantly, from the moment that Sammy was born, it has been strangely clear to us that he is not Lucas. He is different in many ways and this give us hope. I don't know how to explain this opinion, how we know this or what specific detail there is to let us know that.
So, what can we do? Not much but be vigilant and wait. That's about it.